


Lay Off My Jelly

by PureDiscordHell



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Brief mentions of Virgil and Roman, Crofter's Jelly, I wrote it in forty minutes, beware the cringe, hey look its another cringe fic, my discord friend dared me to write this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-11
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-26 01:43:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15653193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PureDiscordHell/pseuds/PureDiscordHell
Summary: Logan’s just really passionate about his jelly.





	Lay Off My Jelly

**Author's Note:**

> Someone in my Discord server dared me to write another cringe fic, so here it is. Enjoy.

Logan was really passionate about Crofter’s jelly. He would probably sell his soul for the stuff, and if you asked him, he wouldn’t deny it.

Logan didn’t tell anyone, but he had a shrine dedicated to his jelly. He didn’t want anyone to see, so he kept it in his bathroom. He had several pictures taken from different angles hanging up on his bathroom door.

Sometimes, at night, he would spend a little over four hours stroking the pictures lovingly and sighing. Of course, he would tell nobody about this. He kept his bathroom door locked and the key hidden at other times. If anybody found out about it, he’d never hear the end of it.

Logan was seen as the smart one. Not as the ‘OwO cringe’ man. No, that was more of Patton’s job. Logan took his role very seriously, thank you very much.

Roman shared Logan’s affiliation for Crofter’s. He doesn’t like it as much as Logan does, the heathen. Patton and Virgil didn’t like it. How could one not like the magnificence of Crofter’s, Logan would never know.

Logan quietly exited his room, making sure to lock that door as well. He liked privacy, give him a break. He entered the kitchen area, spotting Patton eating toast out of a bowl.

Logan narrowed his eyes. “Patton?”

Patton turned around. “UwU I’m just hungry.”

Logan recoiled immediately. What.

Patton grinned, Jelly hanging from his teeth. Logan’s eyes narrowed further. Wait a gosh diddly darn minute. Is that... Crofter’s Jelly?

“Patton,” Logan said slowly, fingers twitching like they always did in close proximity to his guilty pleasure. He inched ever so slowly over to the dad figure. “Is that... Crofter’s Jelly?”

Patton giggled again, making sure to get rid of the jelly in his teeth. “You’re gosh darn tooting _right_ it is!”

Logan took a deep breath. It seemed like Patton was going off the deep end.

Patton leaned over to Logan conspiratorially. “Guess where I got it from?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

Logan’s blood ran cold. No. It couldn’t be. Had he left his bathroom door unlocked? He kept his collection in three of the drawers in the cabinet. Yes, three. He might have an obsession.

“Did you take my Jelly?” Logan asked coldly, hands balling into fists to keep them from twitching.

“No silly, I just stole it from Wo-man,” Patton replied, crunching the toast into powder. He inhaled deeply. “Mm, Jelly.”

Logan started short-circuiting. How could Patton dare to squish up Jelly in all of its magnificent glory.

“OwO what’s this?” Logan asked calmly. Patton froze, eyes going wide. He took a threatening step toward the dad figure, causing him to fall off his stool. Patton looked at Logan fearfully from the floor.

“P-pwease spare me, UwU,” Patton pleaded as Logan stepped closer.

Logan frowned at him. Crofter’s Jelly was the embodiment of heaven. Why should he spare this... _peasant_ of obliterating him? Logan took another step.

Patton scooted further away from Logan. “OwO pwease, Wo-gan, I beg you,” he pleaded.

“Then beg!” Logan roared, lunging forward. Patton screamed, scooting back as far as he could, then twisted away from the logical side as fast as he could. As soon as Patton was on his feet, he was racing through the house.

Logan charged after him. He would catch this one, and make him see. Yes, he would make him see the value of Crofter’s Jelly. Everyone must know.

They must _all_ know.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
